Yes, it has! And I have been so busy thinking and praying and praying and thinking.
In April, Michigan grandson Garrett will be 16 and there's already a pick-up truck (what else?) sitting by the barn waiting to be tagged and insured. A few days after Garrett's birthday, grand daughter Gracie will celebrate her 12th birthday and she is spending her free time at sleepovers at home and with her friends. Both of these kiddos are so busy with football, weight training, soccer, basketball and ballet all the while earning straight "A's" on their schoolwork. My taxi and babysitting services are no longer needed. So, with that being said, I have listed my home to sell.
I have absolutely no regrets. I know many of you wondered at my decision to come north to live so quickly after HC Baker died, and I wondered too. There were many days when I had to force myself to get out of bed, wash my face, brush my teeth and just breathe. In the past three and a half years, I have had the opportunity to love and be loved abundantly by Garrett and Gracie. When they were born, I was so far away and every time I visited, I had to re-introduce myself to them. We have spent my time here creating wonderful memories I know I will always remember and cherish, and I hope they will too! I wouldn't trade this experience for anything. It's been wonderful, and my heart is full.
So once I completely decided to stay for a while and sold my blue cottage and bought the gray beast, I began another part of my journey. As many of you know and some of you have seen, I tackled this house with energy and enthusiasm. I loved watching this house become my home. There is not a room I have not poured my heart into. I love what it has become. But now it's time to move on.
I have been blessed in so many ways by TR Baker. He has been my roommate, my heavy lifter, my yardman, and on many occasions, my "grounder"! TR Baker will remain in northern Michigan. He has wonderful friends, a great job with a bright future, and he loves the out-of-doors just like his Dad. He will make his own way and continue his journey.
Once my home sells, I plan to come back home - Louisville, Kentucky. I have missed my daughter Libby and her family, my sisters and their families, my friends and my church. I have made many new friends up north loving every minute as I was welcomed into this precious community of Topinabee with open arms. Great people are here, and they have wonderful plans to keep this a growing and friendly place to live and vacation. What I have loved most about it is it's a family town. And there's nothing more important than your family.
Without a doubt, I have the most loyal, supportive friends and family in the world. I have discussed my move with several of them and they are ready to help me adjust AGAIN! My word for 2014 is DISCOVER, and that's what I plan to do this year. I look forward to discovering more about myself and others, and especially what the Lord has in store for me next.
There is still a bit of time for any of you to come for a visit. A wonderful old friend is coming in a few weeks. He's quite brave as this morning's temperature was a few degrees below "0" and outside my back door is 4+ feet of snow. I'm excited to see him! I have plenty of bedrooms, a furnace that works really well, and extra pairs of wool socks! You can do this!!!!! (That's a phrase I tell myself often! I also tell myself change is good!)
Don't let exciting opportunities pass you by! DISCOVER what's out there for YOU! I love each and every one of you and am so grateful for the support you have given me. Get ready...I'm on my way back! xxoo
Prayer requests -
My friend CH is on the same "sell my house" journey. Please pray for her.
My friends, husband and wife B & R J are BOTH undergoing chemo treatments. Please pray for them.
Continue to pray for our military and their families.
Pray for our country.
P.S. - Thanks for keeping me laughing with your photos of 3 inches of snow in Louisville!!!!! You all are a funny bunch!
It will be wonderful to have your beaming face back in Derby City! Welcome home!
ReplyDeleteI am so proud of you and amazed by you… the way you just "upped and did it." And now it's time to up and do it again! The way you follow your heart is an example to so many of us who remain in our ruts, hoping for better things, but never acting on our desires. I am tickled for you. I am tickled for myself, too, because I've a much better chance of getting to see you in Louisville than in Topinabee! May all the best continue to follow you wherever you go, my beautiful friend.
ReplyDeleteI am so happy you are returning to Louisville; maybe I will get to see you! I admit, at first when you decided to leave Louisville permanently, I thought what a typical JoAnn impulsive decision! Pardon my bluntness, but didn't you sell a home while H.C. was on a Mission Trip?
ReplyDeleteBut obviously, I misjudged or prejudged your decision. It was the right move for you at that time. Honestly, I think I thought I needed you to join my personal pity party a year and a half later. How selfish of me. You needed time with Emily and her family. God Knew!
Well, I know you wouldn't have come to the party, but politely declined to heal, grieve and move on with your life in your way; which I believe God had planned for you. Gratefully you were listening and followed!
I feel I still learned a lot from you through long distance communication. The most important thing I've learned from you and many others God has placed in my life during the last 2-1/2, almost 3 years is that Grief is personal, we all grieve the way the works for us and most importantly we should never judge another's grief. I believe grief has no time line, as long as we don't get stuck in one phase of grief and we are willing to move on. It doesn't matter if one person gets through it faster than another.
I just realized that was a judgment. I only hope persons suffering can move to a place of less pain in their time. I've also learned you never get over a loss, it stays with you forever; but I have learned we learn to cope with the loss and the coping gets easier. Thankfully, or I wouldn't be able to get out of bed. This life does go on and accepting the loss allows you to be part of it.
As for the questions, oh; so many and so difficult! My first breakthrough moment was when I realized there are no answers on this side! So I quit asking and truly turned to God and said OK, I'm going to just have Faith and trust that they will be answered someday when I can understand. Then I had to accept they won't be answered while I human. Understanding, eternity and everything that will be revealed at the time of our death will be easier because we won't be in the flesh. It isn't anything we can comprehend as humans. So, I accepted that truth and I gained Peace.
It isn't the kind of peace that keeps me from being lonely, which I desperately am everyday without Chuck, but a peace that has kept me from losing my mind! And most importantly doubting my FAITH!
A life-long friend of mine lost her 28 year old son this summer in a tragic car accident. Yes, she received the dreaded knock on her door asking if she was his next of kin. She is finding all kinds of ways to celebrate his life and doesn't like to show or talk about her grief. She is very private and likes to keep her feelings "close to the vest". One day this fall, about 2 months after his death, we were walking at the Reservoir in Crescent Hill and out of the blue, she asked me, "Do you think I will ever see Clayton(her son) or you Chuck again?" Whoa, what a question for a non-theologian seeking theology answers for 2 years! My answer was honest and direct reflecting how I truly feel. Of course, I clarified by telling her I really don't know how we will see them; but from what I understand from scripture we will see them again. Amen!