Have you seen the moon tonight? It's incredible. Go and look right now if you haven't already. I so hope your sky is clear. The moon is so peaceful don't you think? Outside here tonight it's very cold and of course snow is on the ground, but the beautiful, gigantic moon is creating such a quiet, soft night. You can close your eyes and imagine you are anywhere you want to be. It's a "Be still and know that I am God" night. Please enjoy it.
Tomorrow TR Baker will be 34 years old. He requested a turtle cheesecake for his birthday cake. I had no idea it would be so labor intensive. It's cooling now and then I will top it with chocolate ganache and more pecans. Smells delicious! I'll try and not sneak a bite.
Saturday morning TR and I will head south. The weather forecast is cooperating so our trip should be smooth sailing. All day I have been pretty "weepy" and have wondered why. I think it's a combination of several things.
First, TR's birthday...all my children's birthdays squeeze my heart. Of course I remember their births, I was there!!!! TR Baker was my third actual birthing experience but because HC Baker adopted my daughters, this was his first actual birthing experience. If you knew HC Baker at all, you knew he took charge of every situation. We arrived at Baptist East early in the morning. (When the girls were born, fathers were NOT involved in the birth.) HC and I were sent to labor and delivery and we got ready. I had been blessed in the past with very short labors and this one was no exception. Before we knew it we were headed to the delivery room. This was before you had ultrasounds and knew the sex of your baby. However, you need to know that from the moment we knew I was pregnant, we called this baby TR. I wanted to call him Chip but HC wanted initials, wonder why? HC was taken away to get dressed in his "scrubs" and when I arrived in the delivery room, HC was there. In a very few short minutes, TR Baker was born. The doctor and HC hid the baby's sex from me and asked me to guess. I said it's a boy and everyone applauded. All of a sudden HC ran out of the room. I thought maybe the medical part was more than he was ready for, but the student nurse assigned to him followed him out so I knew she'd take care of him. In a few moments he was back saying he had forgotten something. He came right to me and put the most beautiful emerald and diamond ring on my finger, kissed me and told me he loved me - a precious moment in my memories. There are two other notable stories about TR's birth but I'll save those for another day.
Secondly, I'm anxious to see my daughter Libby. I haven't seen her since last summer and I've missed her. Both of my daughters are my best friends. We didn't always see "eye to eye" but all three of us survived my first marriage and divorce. It's was just the three of us for a while and we have very special bonds. My dream trip would be the three of us hidden away somewhere for a week doing absolutely only the things we wanted to do. Wouldn't that be fun?
And lastly, I'm going back to the scene of my life. I'll see so many people and places that were important parts of who I used to be. And I'm not that person anymore. The parts are all there but they've been rearranged, changed forever. I'm the new Jo Ann Baker whether I want to be or not. I'm still not sure who that new person is but she's OK, just sad sometimes.
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